Vitamin D Deficient Marine
$6.99
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If you’ve ever been a Marine trapped on a Navy ship, you already know the truth: sunlight isn’t a right — it’s a myth. A rumor passed down from the last MEU. A distant memory from a life where you touched grass and remembered what the sky looked like. What does exist is the skin of the ship — a steel‑walled crypt where Marines slowly evolve into pale, caffeine‑fueled creatures haunting passageways they were never meant to live in.
This sticker captures that transformation perfectly: a full‑blown, vampire‑coded Marine who hasn’t seen the weather decks in so long they might actually burst into flames if exposed to natural light. It’s a tribute to every time you finally stepped outside after days inside the hull and recoiled like a feral animal discovering daylight for the first time.
Slap it on your gear as a badge of honor — proof that you survived the kind of deployment that turns Marines into berthing‑dwelling, light‑sensitive goblins against their will.
Why It Belongs in Your Arsenal
High‑opacity vinyl that hides whatever questionable surface you slap it on
Smooth, bubble‑free application — unlike your transition from human to fluorescent‑light vampire
Durable indoor‑use vinyl built to survive deployments, berthing life, and the absence of natural light
Thick 95µ film that holds up better than your circadian rhythm after 12 days without seeing the sun
Wipe down whatever you’re sticking it to — this one deserves a clean start.
Vitamin D Deficient Marine
This sticker captures that transformation perfectly: a full‑blown, vampire‑coded Marine who hasn’t seen the weather decks in so long they might actually burst into flames if exposed to natural light. It’s a tribute to every time you finally stepped outside after days inside the hull and recoiled like a feral animal discovering daylight for the first time.
Slap it on your gear as a badge of honor — proof that you survived the kind of deployment that turns Marines into berthing‑dwelling, light‑sensitive goblins against their will.
Why It Belongs in Your Arsenal
High‑opacity vinyl that hides whatever questionable surface you slap it on
Smooth, bubble‑free application — unlike your transition from human to fluorescent‑light vampire
Durable indoor‑use vinyl built to survive deployments, berthing life, and the absence of natural light
Thick 95µ film that holds up better than your circadian rhythm after 12 days without seeing the sun
Wipe down whatever you’re sticking it to — this one deserves a clean start.
Size guide
| HEIGHT (inches) | WIDTH (inches) | |
| 3″×3″ | 3 | 3 |
$6.99